Abortion Bill.

I have just heard that the Texas Republicans have passed a bill to ban abortion in the entire state.
Is this stupid or is this STUPID?
I know abortion has been an ongoing conflicting issue. Many people are against it because of their religious beliefs; because they think people are killing (unborn) children; because of the medical ethical issues surrounding such a practice. And I agree to some degree-I do think women who choose abortion are taking away a life. HOWEVER I do not condemn them for doing so.
Abortion is a difficult choice. I haven't experienced it nor do I know anyone who has aborted but it's so obvious it is. Desperation, fear, instability, guilt, and age are factors that come into play when making the decision to abort. No-one should expect a 13 year old to keep a baby after being raped, could they? No-one should expect a person of any age to keep a child of a rapist in their womb. No-one should expect an unstable woman to keep the unborn child. No-one should expect someone who wasn't ready for the responsibilities of a child to keep it.
Women don't abort because they feel like it. There are so many factors that influence them to come to such a difficult decision- between keeping it or losing it. Morals are questioned. Society influences. What is right, and what isn't?
Wendy Davis, 50, stood there for 13 hours as a voice for ALL WOMEN with no breaks and nothing to learn on to drag out time and prevent this bill from passing. Yet all the Republicans could do was point out anything Davis did to break this rule.
The passing of this bill is sexist. Men think they can control what women do to their body. But, like I said on twitter- men do NOT carry the baby for nine months. They do not have to worry about what they do or don't consume; they do not experience the pain of another being growing inside them; they do not have to worry about the possibility of miscarriages and having to give birth to a stillborn baby. No, all they do is ejaculate that wretched fluid they have into us and sit back and watch us go through pain.

"This is really about women's health," said Sen. Bob Deuell, who introduced a requirement that all abortions take place in surgical centres. "Sometimes bad things can happen."

Read more: http://www.foxnews.com/politics/2013/06/26/texas-lawmaker-filibusters-against-abortion-bill/#ixzz2XOoGQwuf

I cannot fathom what the supporters in Texas are thinking or feeling right now. Health! I am sure women who choose to abort will look at the risk and consider whether to continue or not. This is not for the better. This is men trying to reign control and show their superiority over us. But do you know why?
Because they fear us. They fear that we are becoming more equal and want to continue to have dominance over women. These sexist pricks don't know what it means for women to go through abortion. They don't know the difficult process of having a child grow inside them.
I can't believe this. I hope there are enough protestants to force the Republicans to back down. I hope they're digging their own graves right now.

-UPDATE-
Apparently Wendy Davis won. The women WON. It's time to rejoice, and for the Republicans to step down from their position and wallow in their sad, sad lives.

Homophobia

The other day I had a small rant about homosexuality and homophobia. Many of the people around me will know that I love male gays. No, I am not one of those girls who think it's cool to like gays and want a gay friend- I like them. Their videos and stories are always exciting to see and read. It is probably my biggest turn on after bdsm. Too bad I'm not a guy.

Just kidding.

Sort of.

Anyway, back to homophobia. What is homophobia?

No. These bullshit definitions aren't definitions at all, because there is no such thing as homophobia. "It's not a phobia. You are not scared. You're just an asshole."

Amen.

As one priest had said before "Homosexuality is a sin. But the Bible doesn't say anything about the consequences of a homosexual lifestyle." Why is it, that if there is no consequence, there is a sin? Why is it sinful to love the same sex? We need to realise it is not a sin. It is a sexual orientation in which we can either act or not act upon it. This tight-knit idea that we need to follow Adam and Eve and continue to have heterosexual relationships is idiotic and old. Homosexuality is a sin, but why is it that this particular priest whom I quoted are in favour of their relationship?

I wasn't going to say anything about this topic but it's been running through my mind since last weekend and I can't keep it in anymore. I hate homophobes. Homophobes are only so because they "have thought about it and are disgusted with themselves so they hate on those who have the guts and courage to be who they really are and not hide behind hateful comments."

One homophobe on a particular tumblr commented that gays should go through hormonal therapy to "sort the gay problem." I'm sorry but excuse you? They are not the ones who need it, you are. Modifying genes to stamp out the gay gene isn't going to work either because it is not genetic- it is a SEXUAL ORIENTATION. People who associate themselves with being gay sometimes call themselves "born gay." So sure, maybe some don't choose to be gay. But in the end their sexual orientation will win and they will accept and love themselves.

I am not religious, though my family follows Buddhism. In saying that, I am empathetic. In fact, I have once held interest in becoming a follower of God. It didn't work out, however, though I can't say why.

Just because your God said it does it mean it is true. Many people can base their values and morals on their religion, and I am fine with that. What I am not fine with is the repulsive and disgusting reaction I hear or see when "homophobics" are confronted with gays. We are coming to a new age where a priest even accepts the idea of homosexuality. What does that say about you, who fear it?

"The bible states to love thy neighbour. That's it. There are no other rules or restrictions to that passage. So, we as a church family have to support equality with a smile on our face. THAT is the true Christian way."

BDSM.

Recently I've been getting myself- okay let me rephrase my sentence before it gets a tad bizarre.
Recently I've been reading a lot of fiction that involves bdsm. I'm not sexually active, but sometimes I think to myself "that's the kind of sexual lifestyle I want."
There was a time while I was really into such fiction and it was all I would read. I stopped after a while and when 50Shades came it made me even more reluctant to get myself back into that reading scene. I've started again, thanks to Wattpad and its amazing authors. There was something about this bdsm lifestyle that drew me in. I again wanted to be submissive, to be given that pleasureable pain that so many women in these ficticious novels experienced. I wanted to kneel and give my control to someone else who would love me in a rough way. I wanted to be put on the brink of orgasm but never being allowed to release. oh, God.
But then I ask myself whether I can handle that pain. The blindness, the flogging, the spanking, the gagging, the pleasure in which was being controlled by someone else. I mean, I bruise when my thigh hits the corner of a table, immense pain following. How is it that I will be able to handle the bdsm lifestyle if I can't even handle the corner of a table?
There's also the issue with trust. I am wary of people and don't give up my trust easily. Will I find someone who is into the scene, let alone accept that I want to be a small part of it?
I am no expert on this lifestyle so I don't really know what really goes on. I want a piece of it, and if it's as good as I imagine, I want to be a part of it, too.
I'm really excited to be honest. I can't wait to learn what it means to be submissive for my dominant. I can't wait to experience my first orgasm with pain. I can't wait to have a collar around my neck and leather cuffs on my wrists...
I can't wait.

P.S. There is no influence from 50Shades whatsoever- if you knew me you'd know just how much I hate that trilogy. E.L James is an awful writer- Christian is not deep, Steele (can't remember her name) is imprudish and stupid, and the plot is just terrible. It took me three agonising days to read it and see what the hype is about. If you think that the story was good, you need to re-evaluate yourselves and read real books and novels.
P.P.S. Is there such thing as soft bdsm? I still wonder if I'll ever submerge myself in such rough fucking.

Children.

There is something I fear in the future, and that is having children. I have been known to dwell on things to the point of ridicule, and yesterday was no exception. As I sat in my CAFS class yesterday learning about pregnancy and the ways to conceive, I had thought to myself “I could never nurture a child” and I believe it, to an extent, to be true.

I am not a person of compassion. I am a hard, strong headed woman who only looks after herself. With this kind of attitude and mindset, how is it possible that I will make room for a child?  I fear that if I ever fell pregnant I will not want the child to even begin growing in me. I am scared that if I do I will be inadequate to look after my offspring simply because I am selfish.

I have looked after children before. In my last years of primary school I spent a majority of my free time looking after my sister’s second child. I have even looked after her first child. I have enough experience to look after a newborn and a toddler. It was not a burden before, but it is now.

I loved children. I loved my nieces and would always look after them because I wanted to, not because I needed to. But now as I look at them revulsion builds in me, a hate so strong and deep it is no wonder I don’t explode. I can no longer stand being in the same room as them. I used to think to myself why, but then I began to hate everyone else too. I became self-centred and uncaring of everyone else.

I’m too scared of children now. I’m too scared to have my own. I have already decided to have children, if I have any at all, in my late 20s. I don’t want to be ‘burdened’ by having kids at an early age.

I still need my independence, and I can’t have someone depend on me.