How many times have you heard me complain about my weight? How many times have I said that I will start today, or next week, or soon, because I didn't want to get fit just yet? I have made too many excuses in the past, given up to easily and too quickly. And I know, I know, that I am capable of so much more than this.
Today I signed up to a three month membership to the gym. It seems so ridiculous that I actually did this, because I am such a self conscious person. I could never possibly work out in front of so many people who will be minding their own business. Even during my consultation I was burning with embarrassment as I stepped on the treadmill for the first time in front of noone but my trainer. I endured it, of course, though I felt extremely silly for signing up afterwards. I couldn't do it, I can't do it, so I shouldn't do it, right?
The only thing that is motivating me right now was the shocking measurements I received today. I stand between being skinny and being chubby- but more on the chubby side, and I have always weighed between 55-57kg, so to find out that I'm only 53.5kg was such a joyous yet confusing moment. Joyous, because I weigh 3.5kg less than my last weigh in (a month and a half ago), but confusing because I still look the same. I have not gained any muscle, so it irked me that I was able to lose weight but still have arm fat, thigh fat, stomach fat, fat fat fat. Zzzzzzz.
With a new year everyone gains this big motivation to make a change in their life. I hope that I can use this motivation- though extremely small to me than others- to help me get the body and fitness level I want. I hope that I will love myself more because I am happy with myself.
I believe this time round I will be able to do it. I have to, or my money will go to waste. I know I will have a hard time, I know I will fall. I know I will want to give up some time. But, it's only three months, right? I can do it.
I have to do it.
