Reminisce.

There are days when my heart stirs and longs for him.
To be in love for so long yet so short, how did we become like this?
A ridge between us not even the ocean can fill;
Our hearts too tired to climb over this hill.

The caress of my name from your lips,
your subtle touch and your gentle kiss.
Your eyes, your smile;
the sea and the sky-
I miss it, I miss it all.

There are days when my heart stirs and longs for him.
And there are days where
I wish
I didn't fall in love
with him.

I fell in love too fast,
too fast for you to catch
and the fall was
harder
than I could ever imagine.

Weak.

Last night I cried for the first time in three weeks. Three weeks of enduring silently, hurting painfully, shutting everything that actually meant to me out. I can't deal. I've kept my emotions down and in check for far too long, and when Kevin asked me how I was, I knew he cared. I knew he cared, and so I couldn't lie.
I cried. I felt so helpless, so pitiful. I felt so weak because I couldn't hide what hurt me well enough.
I suppose it's suppose to make me feel better, letting it all out, but all I feel is an emptiness that's been eating my soul away for years.